Ditching Dairy

I mentioned a while back that I was going to try eliminating dairy from my diet to see if it would help Charlotte’s gas issues. Catch was annoyed with me, insisting that babies just have gas and I was overreacting. While it’s true that babies have gas, our baby was straining and arching her back and she went from happy and easy going to fussy, screamy and difficult. Something had to give. I was not prepared to just accept this as our reality.  

At the same time, I not-so-secretly hoped eliminating dairy wouldn’t make a difference. I love cheese. And butter. And pizza. Almost all of my favorite foods use some form of dairy. 

Fortunately and unfortunately, ditching dairy has made a big difference. We have our easygoing baby back. She still burps and farts and fusses over gas sometimes, but it’s on a normal, manageable level. 

I’m still getting the hang of being dairy-free. It’s really a pain in the ass sometimes. Especially since EVERY SINGLE meal my SIL made and froze for us when she was here has cheese in it. I’m getting used to checking labels and menus for allergy information–fortunately, most labels will call out whether a product contains dairy for allergy purposes.

I’m honestly blown away by the things that contain dairy. Even my favorite granola bars contain whey protein. So frustrating! And gone are the days of going out for pancakes on the weekend. Now I have no choice but to make them at home. Boo. 

It’s worth it to have a happy baby, but man I miss pizza. (I actually ordered pizza with no cheese the other night. It’s as disappointing as it sounds.)

And seriously… Isn’t there ANYTHING about breastfeeding that can just be easy for me? I feel like I’m constantly being punished for trying to provide food for my baby that doesn’t have corn syrup as its first ingredient (formula). 

Anyway, I’m looking for some good (easy) dairy-free recipes. If you have anything worth sharing in your recipe arsenal (or any dairy-free tips in general), let me know! I will pay you in cute baby pictures. 


The Odd Man Out

My inlaws are visiting. My Catholic, conservative, redneck inlaws. 

The pope is visiting, too. 

Catch is at work, so I’m alone with them and we’re watching the news. 

So far, our President is a Muslim monkey who has cheapened the presidency and made us an international joke, the First Lady is a whore for not wearing suits, and Hillary Clinton is a bitch. 

All said while they’re holding my baby. 

Please send vodka. 

Cloth Diapers

We use a diaper service, and last night we ran out of cloth diapers. Today is our delivery day, so rather than wash them ourselves, we decided to fill the gap with disposables. 


And then we had a bath. 

Much better. 

The Boob Chronicles

My magic non-FDA approved pills arrived from the sketchy overseas pharmacy on Thursday last week. I immediately started taking the dose recommended by the lactation consultant who first suggested it: 20 mg (two pills) every 6 hours. (Keep in mind that I am not a small person.)

We’re only 4 days in, but I’m already seeing a difference. It’s not dramatic–I have not turned into a breast milk fountain overnight–but it’s absolutely an improvement. I’m pumping about an extra half ounce most of the time, and two days in a row my 2 am pump has yielded a full extra ounce (!). It adds up when you consider that I’m pumping between 5 and 7 times a day depending on how my day goes with Charlotte. If I can’t pump, she’ll nurse but she is not a very efficient nurser–another story for another day. 

That’s the up side to the Dom. The down side is the headaches. The last few days I’ve had some brutal headaches. In fact, I have one right now and I regret taking a measly two Advil–I should have gone straight for the big stuff left from my recovery from Charlotte’s birth. 

I have read that the headaches are temporary or that they’ll go away if the dose is lowered. I’m hesitant to lower my dose just yet, so I’m hoping my body will adjust and the headaches will stop.

I’ve also had some dry mouth, but that’s certainly not a deal breaker. 

If you had told me 5 weeks ago that I’d still be doing this breastfeeding dance, I wouldn’t have believed you. I’m pretty proud of myself for sticking with it. It’s still pretty exhausting, but I’m no longer daydreaming about quitting. In fact, I really can’t imagine quitting now. It’s worth it just to be able to see this little drama queen’s antics when she’s done nursing. 


PS I can’t even tell you how much I love my Spectra pump. The freedom the rechargeable battery gives me is the best. I can take that thing anywhere. It’s wonderful. 


Go Figure

You were right. At least, all of you who said it would get a bit easier around 6 weeks were right.  I’m not saying that things are all sunshine and rainbows, but I have noticed a definite shift in things over the last 5 days or so. 

The weekend helped big time. Catch had Friday AND Monday off, and it was heaven. Friday morning we went out for breakfast. With the baby. And we both got to eat hot food at the same time. 


After breakfast we went shopping to buy the new gazebo/shade thingy for our back yard and she slept the whole time we paced the store contemplating whether it’s too damn big for our yard or not. 

Spoiler: it’s perfect for our concrete jungle of a yard. On Monday, we had 6 people eating dinner under there and there was still plenty of room for Charlotte’s pack & play. I love it when a plan comes together. 

In case you thought the “OMG I left the house” excitement ends there, we did it AGAIN for a family party on Saturday (where Catch’s aunt refused to wash her hands and I almost lost my mama bear shit). AND THEN WE DID IT AGAIN ON SUNDAY when we met a friend for breakfast in our old neighborhood. 
And guess what? I’m taking her to the mall today. It’s about a thousand degrees outside and I need to give our air conditioning a break lest we end up with another gazillion dollar water & power bill. Our first one for the new house just about gave me a heart attack. 

I am feeling much less anxious overall. It’s not perfect, but it’s better. 

I’m still doing the pump dance, but I seem to have a much better attitude about it. I’m less resentful of the stupid thing now that I’m conscious that the decision to keep going is mine and mine alone. Yes, guilt is still a tiny factor, but the satisfaction I get from feeding her an ounce of breast milk outweighs the inconvenience of getting up in the middle of the night even though the baby is still sleeping. Hopefully the magic pills I ordered from the magic overseas pharmacy will help give me a bit of a break, but they’re still on their way to me. Say hi to my meds if you see them, New York!

My child is presently pooping in her swing, but before I go change her, have any of you tried probiotics for baby tummy troubles? After a few days of them this kid has THE WORST farts and poops. Holy hell its disgusting. I stopped giving them to her because this just doesn’t seem right to me. Anyone have any experience?

A few baby pics for making it this far:



I can’t post this on Facebook, so I’m posting it here: 

If I ask you to wash your hands before you touch my baby, don’t argue with me. Just wash your fucking hands.

You make my baby sick, I make you sick. 


This is what we say to people who don’t wash their hands…