One Week

It’s officially been a week since we transferred our two blasts. So far, they’re behaving more like teenage girls than bundles of cells—all drama, all the time! They are microscopic, and yet they are already testing my patience.

Here’s where we stand:

Yesterday’s spotting seems to have stopped. It was reasonably light, but it was definitely there. Sort of pinky-red. It was really hard to say color-wise since it was mixed with so much of the white powder from progesterone suppositories. It definitely wasn’t brown, which I probably would have felt much better about. I’m hopeful that it has stopped for the time being, but still terrified that it was there. It’s entirely possible that my poor cervix is irritated from all of these powdery progesterone capsules. Or it could be something else.

I also have cramps. Mostly dull ones, but since yesterday I keep feeling a sharp pain on my left side in my ovary region, which sort of terrifies me. It comes in short bursts like a stabbing feeling, and then it stops and it won’t happen again for hours. I didn’t think much of it at first, but it really hurt for a few minutes when I was driving home from work yesterday and then I got home and discovered the spotting. It could be related, or it could not be related. Only time will tell. I am trying very hard not to think about the words chemical and ectopic.

The silver lining:

When I compare the photos of tests from the last 3 days, there is a difference. We definitely have something going on in there.

IMG_6611

Do you ever just feel like you know too much? I think if I was an average person who just got a positive on a pregnancy test, none of the bad stuff would ever even occur to me.  I kind of resent that in a way.

There was no offer of an earlier beta from our nurse yesterday or this morning, so we have to tough it out until Monday. I’ve decided not to push it because deep down, I know that a single beta isn’t going to make me feel any better. I won’t have any relief until we get our second set of numbers, and even if I went in on Friday for round 1, I’d still have to wait through the weekend for round 2. Either way, it’s going to be an anxiety-filled weekend, so I may as well just hang tight and keep peeing on things.

In the meantime, if anyone could help me find my brain’s “off” switch, that would be great. I would sure love to get more than 4 hours of sleep sometime soon.

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18 thoughts on “One Week

  1. First of all, I had no idea you were on prog suppositories! That very well could’ve been the cause of the spotting. I’ve heard stories of other ladies I’ve met on Twitter who were a little too, uh, aggressive a few times and that can cause bleeding.

    Second, it’s good that it is stopping. Regardless of what it is. For peace of mind. 🙂

    Third of all, again, the pains could be normal or be bad. It sucks. I had cramping like craaaaazy the week of, and weeks following, my BFP. It worried me at first but eventually I was like “fuck it, if it’s bad then it’s bad.” You can’t stop it. You can’t do anything to find out what it is. So try not to stress. Believe it or not, your uterus is already changing like crazy making space for your little embie. The thing you want to watch out for is constant or worsening pain in your side. That could be a sign of an ectopic. If that happens, call the nurse and she’ll probably bring you in for a scan. There won’t be a heartbeat or probably not even a yolk sac this early but they would probably see a gestational sac or *some* evidence of it being where it’s supposed to be, i.e. your uterus.

    Thinking good thoughts still for you, hun. 🙂 You’ll make it through this weekend! And hopefully have spectacular numbers next week. 🙂 ❤

    • Thanks so much for the positive thoughts! And you’re totally right–nothing I can do about it anyway. I really do need to find a way to chill out. Hopefully I can keep myself plenty distracted between now & Monday!

  2. That line is FOR SURE darker, and that is a GREAT sign! I agree that the suppositories could 100% be to blame when it comes to the spotting. When I had some light spotting (twice, one around 7 weeks, another time around 9) my doc said your cervix in the early stages is highly friable and can get very easily irritated – it’s one reason she doesn’t prescribe supps and goes with PIO shots. So, maybe that’s some relief? I definitely had cramping for the first few weeks as well.
    I know nothing any of us says will make you feel confident – not a lot can when you’re in camp infertile and finally pregnant (which, BTW, YOU ARE!) but know that we are all pulling for you and those teeny tiny drama queens! ❤

    • I keep having to remind myself that right now, I am pregnant. It’s really kind of trippy. I need to just be happy and stop worrying. It’s not as if I can control any of it, anyway. I wish I could get that message to stick!

  3. EEEP! I knew it I knew it I knew it. My good feeling was right. This is an *awesome* progression. Cramps can be good! The ovary area is a bit troubling but I’ve been having that too and my numbers do not suggest ectopic. Can they get you in for an early beta so you can start watching the rise to reassure you it’s not ectopic? I’m *really* excited for you, can you tell??

      • Yes but thankfully in my case it’s been more recent (I’m 6w today) and after I had clearly doubling betas so I think it is very unlikely to be ectopic (though not impossible, I put back two like you did). I had this pain with my one successful pregnancy but it wasn’t IVF so I had a corpus luteum and a mother of a cyst. So it made sense there. I’m going to ask about this tomorrow and see what the ultrasound shows. I really hope yours is just weirdness, too, but because you’re earlier into this I really would press your RE to check levels sooner so you can watch for anything that might suggest an issue. And don’t google it whatever you do. That’s some serious form of torture. When is your scheduled beta?

  4. I could have wrote this post!! I’m 8dp5dt and can’t help but think chemical and ectopic. It’s unfair that we can’t celebrate our beautiful positive pregnancy tests! I’m also getting the cramps. They are scary and pretty painful! I get them a few times throughout the day if I move or sit to stand too quickly.

    I’m wishing you so much luck that you get really lovely beta numbers. Xxx

    • Oh my, it’s so nice to have someone else in this boat! I’ve sort of been feeling like a lunatic. 🙂 I just started following you, so I’ll have to catch up. Wishing you an abundance of luck as well! When is your beta?

      • My clinic only scehdules one when i ring up with my positive test at 11dp5dt!! How much more torture can this be!!?? It is nice to read a similar journey. Theres about 4 of us that ive seen get a positive within a few days of each other! So exciting! 🙂 xx

      • That’s gotta be frustrating! Mine is at least already scheduled for 11dp5dt! There has definitely been a rash of positives this week-ish. It’s very exciting!

  5. I’m so excited by the progression on the sticks!!! (As a side note, who knew looking at sticks other people pee one would make me happy? Yup, clearly this falls in the category of knowing too much).
    It’s too early to know what all the symptoms mean, so I’m going to send you good thoughts and keep thinking that everything is progressing just as it should! 🙂

  6. That line is definitely darker, which is a great thing…Callie had some really sharp pains too which she described as “Needles in my vag!”…she had those for probably the first 2-3 weeks after her 5DT…that all sounds really promising, and the way you described it is exactly what she felt…i’ll probably be just as anxious as you waiting for that beta!

  7. The line is absolutely getting darker! That’s awesome. I’m sorry you’re having so many ups and downs and have to wait. You’re right about the wait though; the second beta is more nerve-wracking and important than the first anyway. Sending good luck!

  8. yay those lines are looking great! Oli had that stabbing pain too in the ovary and we freaked out.. doc said it was from the egg dropping which sometimes can cause a small cyst which goes away on its own after a couple of weeks. They did a ultrasound which detected it. Lots of positivity your way!!! can’t wait for betas!

  9. You are so right, we definitely know way too much! I’d love to be one of those people that gets the positive at home, and thinks, wow, I’m going to have a baby in 9 months. Maybe in another life. Regardless though, these lines look good, they are getting darker. Continuing to send prayers your way!

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